I have enjoyed a lovely relationship that lasted for over two years and I can authoritatively tell you that it is one of the very best feeling. You are happy and very fulfilled. We went out together did fun things together and were really in love.
Though we were not married and lived in different states we felt close and the distance was only one thing as we were lost in the many things we had to enjoy together. Some people even said we were inseparable and were meant for each other. The fact that we are not together any more is not the point here as we were never meant for each other. The point here is that there are things that keep a relationship going, things that keep the wheels oiled and running that when you apply you will be happy.
If you have someone who plays with you as you watch your favorite television shows, reminds you of you appointments (medical or others), helps you finish your coffee, always has a smile ready for you… do not let them go.
As a person who once enjoyed that and still hopes on it there are some tips I feel will help as you go.
Do you know what you want in this relationship ?
–‘THIS IS WHAT I REALLY WANT…’ Be very clear on what you really want. This does a lot to you as a person. First it makes you come to a clear understanding that you know who you really are and you are not confused about that. Then it lets your partner know that that is what you really want.
A lot of people are romantically cripple, so to speak. They find it hard to be clear on what they want and find it even harder if they have to tell what they want to a man.
If you want your partner to undress you during intercourse (I love when this is done on me) or you want your hair pulled in bed or you want your partner to only kiss you after brushing in the morning or you even want them to take out the trash each morning just say so. Just open your mouth and speak the words.
This will not kill you, if anything it will give your partner a clearer understanding to what you want and your person. Again feel free to read what I wrote about communication (I am considering writing more on the subject).
Communication is key to every relationship. Always lets your partner know what you want.
–‘YOU ARE MY CHOICE…’. Despite seeing his dirty inner wear, and having their hair stuck in the comb or on the soap bar or seeing their toothpaste spit in the sink or their unflushed shit in the toilet, letting them know that today i choose you is so romantic. Especially when you know that being together with one another is a choice that you make on a daily basis.
-‘I love’ (insert a nice quality of theirs. Be specific). There is a high probability that you know why your partner loves you. Maybe because of your smartness, you are funny, your dress sense e.t.c.
But love really grows when the little lovely aspects of a person are picked upon and cherished. Maybe as they make their face as they shave, as he assists in unbuckling your shoe, etc. Some of those little things that go a long way to gladden the heart of the partner. ‘I love the way you make your face help me knot my hair’
-‘Hello, that really hurt my feelings, do not do it again’. I really hope you do not get here but what if you do? It is my hope that you do not have to say this daily. But when your partner hurts your feelings it is advisable to get it out and move on. As they say life is too short to hold on to little resentments. Get it out and move on.
-‘I really do appreciate you’. It is very important that what ever you like or love about this person you say it. You clean you face while he tucks the kids in to bed, he cleans the room while you clean up the kitchen counter, he gets pop corn as you queue up Netflix. I am trying to describe little things you know you would miss ab out your partner should they die or be hit by a bus.
Say it as often as you think it. It really cost you nothing but on the other hand is a great investment.
-‘I like you’. Love is a great thing but liking someone is very important. I love you has almost become reflex. When you tell someone ‘I like you’ they feel they have just been appreciated.
Reminding someone you like reminding them how much you appreciate them. It is a total different level of admiration that is really worth it.
Let me know how this article has helped you.
Photo Credit: Glamour